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“LABELS”

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I haven’t been traveling much but did some for officiating at Northern Cass recently and I have been thinking a lot about “Labels.” What is the point of labels? We label everyone from the day we start school and beyond. I feel that labels make people feel insignificant and significant at the same time. Did you ever label someone after just one visit with them or even after just one look? I think Bullying becomes a big factor which I will leave alone for another post. What if there were no labels?
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When did I start noticing labels in school? Hmmmm it was probably about Middle School when I started actually noticing. Of course, when you are that young it is about who is cute or handsome or even who is a nerd or sporty. Why can’t we be pretty and a nerd? I think there is some bad connotations around certain words such as NERD or JOCK. These words, I believe, aren’t bad or shouldn’t be bad but when you are young they can hurt and give you a complex that may stay with you for a long time.
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However, when you get to high school these words start to follow you. Sure I have labeled someone I’m guessing at some point as I’m definitely not perfect. I’m not sure what my label was, maybe sporty or goody two shoes which I heard a lot in high school since I followed the rules. Whatever your label was did it follow you???? Were you able to break out of the label??? I think labels don’t really give you a picture of who the person actually is just a snapshot. Like the saying goes, “Don’t judge a book by it’s cover.” I feel like there are more labels in high school such as class clown, popular, jock, princess, clicks, slut, etc…..

Society-Labels
Once you hit college I feel like the labels start to disappear a little like reinventing yourself which I saw as an opportunity. Of course, I was still a goody two shoes and didn’t go out and party as I had to study in order to make the grades. It was great though because everyone was in the same boat and didn’t know anyone so there is a fresh new outlook on who each other is and who we could become. After college you enter the “REAL” world and begin a job.  Who would have thought that there would even be “labels” there too or more so titles as they call them.  I know there has to be a hierarchy at places of employment so we know who is in charge and who makes the final decisions but do these labels make someone better than another? Have you had a title that made you feel like you could walk all over the other employees?? Did it give you POWER?  I believe that we are given these labels to provide leadership and make those around us better.  The job “labels/titles” should never give you the right to make those around you feel fear or resentment!
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What about some other labels that I see everyday in the news or on social media articles such as; loser, crazy, transgender, gay, lesbian, African American, Caucasian, Native American, Muslim, Jew, Catholic, rich, poor, etc…. do these tell the whole story about a person?  When did it become about labels and not the individuals?  Why can’t we all just be human beings that get a long because we choose not because of what we are labeled?  Why in the media do we feel the need to portray the labels in a bad light?  I challenge you take away the label from yourself and others around you and just BE.
“You see us as you want to see us—in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain…and an athlete…and a basket case…a princess…and a criminal. Does that answer your question?” ~The Breakfast Club
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Music this past two weeks was some Hootie & The Blowfish, wow, the memories that come from those songs from Jr. High dances to first crushes to sleepovers.  I love looking back at some of the best times growing up as I hope my daughter gets to experience all those things and find the music. Here are a few of my favorites:
Let Her Cry: Cracked Rear View
Time: Cracked Rear View
Hold My Hand: Cracked Rear View
Bonus Track: Shinedown is coming out with a new album comes out in September. The one thing about Shinedown is always hearing the stories behind their songs so please take a listen as I find myself listening to this quite often:
Acoustic version of Shed Some Light: Us and Them
Until Next Time……….THANK YOU….11209458_10152953770336637_4965119752807894117_n

Struggle 2.0

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Traveled to Grand Forks this week and thought about everything that has been going on with me in the last few months and it has definitely been a ride. I have learned some new things about myself which I believe I knew all along but having an outside person tell you it puts a whole new perspective in to play.

Sitting in therapy Session 2:
“What did you call that? Codependency? It makes so much more sense when she says and explains it. Great now what am I going to have to do? Just what I thought learn more about it, so I guess I better find a good book or articles on it. I wonder how much work this is going to take? Why did this happen to me?”

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Being in therapy has brought a lot to my attention especially the word Codependency. This is something I have struggled with my whole life and new something was different but of course didn’t know a term was associated with it. I have done things the same way for years and got into a habit of letting others walk all over me. It is embedded in me.  Having equal friendships/relationships with people is huge, I know this but learning how to set barriers I struggle with. I always want to help others and make sure everything is okay with everyone else around me instead of knowing what is good for me. It is just so much easier making someone else’s day and being there for them so I never saw the full effect of it. If I set those barriers or limits, of course there is going to be guilt that goes along with it. There are ways to handle all of this but the effort that needs to go in is so draining.  Yes, of course I know it’s worth it, just tough! Here is a great article that to me says it all when it comes to what I have going on: *Click Here*

Sitting in therapy Session 3:
“This is so not easy and I’m still so nervous and don’t know what I should hold back or say for the fear of saying something wrong or bursting into tears. Why do I keep coming back? Should I get out of the car? Is this going to help me anyway? Maybe I fine and can be done with these? Just breathe. She knows what she is talking about and wants to help and you are here to feel better and be better for everyone around you.”

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We all do things we don’t realize sometimes and even though it may not be intentional it can still be very hurtful to those around you. I think recognizing I was loosing my grip on things was the first step in being better but this isn’t easy at all. It takes a lot of work to dig deep and look at what is causing the pain and how to handle it. I know I have to put the work in, in order to be better and it is going to take some time to be the person I want to be. Of course there is going to be slip ups as that is just life but being able to manage those slip ups is key.  Some days I feel like the world is crashing and I may not show it but it is such a crazy feeling.  Other days are fine and everything seems normal.  Everything is a work in progress and that is what I have to hold on to.

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Music has been interesting for the past few weeks as I have been listening to some old and new songs, but for the drive today we are going with Seether as I have seen them a few times in concerts and they put on an awesome show. Take a listen below:

Fine Again (Favorite and have listened to this one a lot): Fragile
https://www.youtube.com/embed/ET3-t1jFmo0“>


Broken: Disclaimer
https://www.youtube.com/embed/hPC2Fp7IT7o“>

Fake It: Finding Beauty in Negative Spaces
Remedy: Karma and Effect

Bonus Track: I was told by an awesome friend about a song called “Fair” by Remy Zero which is from the movie “Garden State”. I just love it, enjoy!!!:)
https://www.youtube.com/embed/JbGTzJcyjGI“>

Remember to be your Authentic Self & Until Next Time…….

Thankful 100

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As I traveled to Lisbon yesterday, I took time to think about what I am THANKFUL for and decided to do the Thankful 100 List which a friend had done in his blog. This seemed so easy at first as I am so Thankful for each day I get to wake up but as I went along it got a little tricky. I may not be the most positive person but I do realize that I am truly blessed. Hopefully will be able to look back on this and live less selfishly and more in the moment as I move forward.
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Here is my list and I hope you take the time to do the Thankful 100 as it is truly eye opening.
1. Being able to wake up in the morning
2. My amazing little family
3. My incredible extended family
4. My full of spunk Grandma who has taught me so much about life
5. Simplicity
6. Quiet evenings at my Grandma’s farm
7. Chai Tea in the mornings
8. Music
9. Inspirational Books
10. Therapy
11. My awesome Co-workers
12. My job
13. My health
14. NDSU
15. Mentors
16. Cozy hooded sweatshirts
17. Photos
18. Sunday morning snuggles with Jocey
19. My faith
20. Officiating
21. Track and Field
22. My alone time
23. Roadtrips with family
24. Coffee Shops-The Lighthouse
25. Writing my Blog
26. New and Old Friends
27. Inspirational Movies
28. Quotes
29. Colored pics by Jocey
30. Running
31. Getting the mail
32. Traveling for work
33. Laughter:)
34. All my fabulous employees that worked for me at the Wellness
35. Rollerblades
36. Concerts
37. School shopping in Albertville with Family
38. North Dakota State Fair with Family
39. Giving presents
40. Special Olympics
41. Root Beer Floats
42. Meditation
43. My planner
44. Mizuno Running Shoes
45. Dancing
46. Shinedown
47. Rockband
48. Cookie Dough Ice Cream
49. Summer Nights under the stars
50. Swimming Pools
51. Netflix
52. Tattoos
53. Coloring
54. “The Lion King” movie
55. Positive people
56. My MP3 player
57. Working Out
58. “The Arrow”
59. Sweatpants
60. Olympics
61. Bison Football
62. Quiet Moments
63. My mom’s cooking/baking
64. Those last moments before you are no longer able to see them
65. LOVE
66. Childhood memories
67. Tears
68. The bad times as I have only learned more from them
69. 80’s Music
70. People who support me no matter what
71. Jon Gordon Books
72. Random Fun
73. Dairy Queen: My first real job with an amazing boss
74. People who listen to me even though they might not want to!:)
75. Reading
76. Hot Showers
77. Cinnamon Toast Crunch
78. Reading to Jocey at before bed
79. Four-wheeling
80. Quite walks
81. Fargo Marathon Kids run
82. Student Staff BBQs
83. TED Talks
84. Inspirational People like Zach Sobiech
85. Candyland and Monopoly
86. Cozy Blankets
87. Walking in the rain
88. Playing basketball
89. State Track Meet – met amazing people
90. Roller Coasters
91. Rainbows after the storm
92. The fort by the creek
93. Ice Skating with friends
94. Weddings to see family
95. Young and the Restless and Bold & the Beautiful to escape reality:)
96. Hand written cards
97. Candlelight
98. Planted flowers of all different colors
99. Volunteering my time
100. Lying in Jocey’s bed before bedtime with lights out and staring at her stars on the ceiling and talking about our day!:)
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I know most of these are random and all over the place. As you noticed I didn’t put down things like air, water, and etc… for a reason. I am sure I missed really important things but this what I came up with in no specific order.
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I think writing this list has given me perspective once again how important life really is and that we need to live in the moment. It has been a rough year but I am trying to be more positive as I obviously have a lot to be Thankful for.
What’s your 100???
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Music of the day/trip was Theory of a Deadman as they have amazing songs, take a listen below:
Angel-Savages 2014
Livin My Life Like a Country Song-Savages 2014
By The Way-Scars & Souvenirs 2008
World War Me-Savages 2014
Bonus Song: Counting Crows-I use to have this song on repeat, just love it!!:) Enjoy!
A Long December-Recovering the Satellites 1996
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Until Next Time………..

Love & Hate Collide

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Well it has been a crazy few weeks traveling all over and I have been doing a lot of soul searching and I am still discovering who I am and who I want to be. I was thinking about the things I love and hate (When Love and Hate Collide-Listen) which sometimes we don’t evaluate as we conform to what others think instead of what we truly think and want.

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Here are some of my LOVES/FAVORITES:
Color: UNC Blue
Food: Cheese
Animal: Dog (Alaskan Husky) I have never had a pet.
Band: Shinedown
Song: Somewhere Over the Rainbow: Israel Kamakawiwoole Listen Here
Concert: LIVE
Quote: “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” My grandma Char used to say it to me all the time growing up.
Sport to do: Track
Sport to watch: Track and Field
Professional Athlete: Michael Jordan & Steve PreFontaine (Hard to choose just one)
College Football Team: NDSU Bison
College Basketball Team: UNC
Professional Basketball Team: Lakers (Don’t watch the WNBA)
Movie: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun
Vacation: a quiet place, a beach, good food, simple
Place I would like to visit: Australia
Shoes: Mizuno Running Shoes
Clothing: Concert T-shirts and an old school Bottineau baseball jersey
Place to just chill: My grandma’s farm
Flower: White Roses
Swimming and being in water
Cartoon: Thundercats
Superhero: Thor
Cuddling
Drink Choice: Morgan Limebite
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Have you ever done those lists on Facebook that you needed to respond about yourself? Why not, as you may learn something about yourself.  Well, I decided to complete one!:)
1. Hair down or up? Mostly down
2. Jeans or yoga pants?: Jeans
3. Painted or non painted nails?: Painted
4. Flip flops or sneakers?: Flip Flops
5. Big or small purse?: Huge
6. Tattoos? 4 & more to come
7. Piercings?: 5
8. Diamonds or pearls?: Both
9. Rap or country music?: Both
10. Height?: 5’9″
11. Sports or couch?: Sports
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Dislikes & Pet Peeves
Put your pen cap back on the pen after using it
Dishonesty
Cooked broccoli with cheese sauce (got sick on it as a kid)
Dresses/skirts
Cavaliers
Clean up after yourself
Wearing socks
Those individuals who don’t actually listen to what you are saying
Energy Vampires
Being in 95 degree heat with humidity
Not knowing how to merge on the interstate
Beer

Do you know what you love and dislike?  If not, I challenge you to find out and discover what you enjoy and embrace it.  I think we all need to be ourselves and live to our full potential.

Stuart Scott
Music over this past few weeks goes back to my favorite band Shinedown as they have a new release, check it out:
Be a fighter, backbone, desire
Complicated and it stings, but we both know what it means
And it’s time to get real and inspired
Did you hide yourself away?
Are you living through the ghost?
Did you finally find a place
Above the shadows so the world will never know?
The world will never know you like I do
My own little girl, she loves music like her mom!;)
Until Next Time…………

*FREEDOM*

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20150704_204001*Fire Ninja*
I hope you all had a wonderful 4th weekend. I traveled a few times to Grand Forks last week and yesterday I was in Cooperstown, ND. With the 4th passing us by I have been thinking about what Freedom really means to me and again if you are reading this it is only my opinion.

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In the United States we are Free and again I love living in this country as the world seems pretty harsh in other countries, however I think being Free means a lot of different things to different people. I will start with freedom of speech, hmmmmm well what if we actually said what we felt??? I see a lot of posts on Social Media which is supposed to be a place where you can go and give your opinion on a lot of matters, but if you do this just remember you are going to have backlash no matter what side you are on. I tend to not post a lot of opinions because there is a lot of haters out there and it isn’t worth my time to go back and forth with them. I think we should be able to have our own opinion without others putting us down as we should be able to live in peace, of course all opinions matter and difference of opinion is accepted but not when it gets out of control with hateful words. So how Free do you feel about voicing how you feel? Do you put it all out there on Facebook or Twitter?
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The most recent debate is the right of the gay community to marry which really makes me wonder if we are so FREE in this country than why is there a problem with this? Everyone should be able to be married to the person they LOVE. Isn’t that what it is all about is to LOVE and be LOVED and for anyone to judge this is very interesting to me. I see a lot of individuals with such strong opinions against gay marriage, however if these individuals get married how does it actually affect you? What if someday your child is born gay and wants to get married what would you say “No” or would you love them no matter what? Every human being deserves to be loved no matter race, religion, sexual orientation, and etc… Who are we to judge? I try to instill this in my daughter all the time that these things do not matter as what matters is to love everyone for who they are on the inside with all of your heart. The other day she asked me “Mom can a girl marry a girl and a boy marry a boy?” and I couldn’t lie to her so I sat down and explained it all the best way I knew how and I hope as she gets older this whole subject will be in the past. I just saw in the news that there is a bakery that is refusing to make a wedding cake for a gay marriage, I mean really come on that is just awful. There are people even in our state that are trying to protest this ruling and I am sorry but if you have that much time on your hands then why not help or volunteer with the women’s shelter or the homeless as that is where our focus should be is on other huge issues.
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Somedays I feel our country is going backwards which is so unfortunate for all of us as there is more crime and hurtful situations happening everyday. Now look at race, I think things are getting out of hand when it comes to this issue on all sides of the story. I am pretty sure Martin Luther King is looking down shaking his head at all the issues that still arise regarding race. I feel so bad because he worked so hard along with a lot of other individuals to make this not an issue. I was so excited when I saw that Misty Copeland (Read Article) was made the first woman, African American principal dancer for American Ballet Theatre in the company’s 75 year history. They call her a trailblazer among other African American women in ballet history but why at this point are there still trailblazers at all? I was also recently reading a story on a Native American actress, Misty Upham (Read Article), who finally after a ton of hard work made it to the big screen (August: Osage County-Great Movie) but then was tragically killed. Her family was treated so horribly and wether is was a race issue or just horrible human beings, you can decide for yourself. Do these individuals feel FREE in this country?????

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I could go on and on about this topic as I didn’t even scratch Women’s Rights and maybe that is another post. I love this country and for all that it stands for but it is our job as citizens to make it a place where people want to be, a place where everyone has an opportunity to be who they are. We have many men and women who fight for this country on a daily basis so it can stay a FREE land and I think it is up to us back on our soil to make the peace and give love. I didn’t right this post to try and change anyone’s mind if you have a different point of view but maybe I was able to at least make you think. I always challenge myself to see others viewpoints and we can always agree to disagree. The moral of this story is that you can do and become anything if you put your mind to it as this is a FREE country.
Music during my trips was Halestorm as they have a powerful message and there is a concert being played at the Red River Valley Fair coming up this Saturday which I am very ecstatic for as I have seen them perform once already and it is going to be an awesome show. Take a listen to a few of my favorites and enjoy!:)
Dear Daughter
Hold your head up high
There’s a world outside
That’s passing by
Dear Daughter
Never lose yourself
Remember that
You’re like nobody else
I hate it when you see me cry
Your t-shirt soaked through from my eyes
When I’m not as tough as I should be
And you see the softest part of me
I Miss the Misery: The Strange Case of…
Apocalytic: Into the Wild Life
Amen: Into the Wild Life
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Until Next Time…………

Simon Says!

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Traveled to Hillsboro, Mayville, and Hatton today so needless to say I have had some time on my hands and have been thinking a lot about Leadership and what it actually means.
What does being a leader mean to you? Are you a leader in your everyday life? I believe being a leader can have many definitions as we all view things differently, however I think there are a few characteristics that all leaders do and should posses. I had the privilege of being a boss for almost 8 years to the most amazing college students. I am no expert when it comes to being a boss or a leader but I do have some insight on how to become the best you can be with both. I had amazing teachers to show me how to treat a team and read a lot of leadership books to understand how to make it work. My first book was “The Energy Bus” by Jon Gordon.
“Love Your Passengers.” ~Jon Gordon (Energy Bus)
Get to Know the People That Work For You:
The first thing that comes to mind when I talk about leadership is getting to know the people that work for you. Some people may think yes I already did that but I mean really get to know the people who work for you as in learn everything there is to know about what makes them tick. Of course, there are some things when you are a boss that you don’t need to know but I’m talking about the way they learn, think, what they like, who they want to become and etc…. The first thing I use to ask a new employee was “what would you like to accomplish while you are here.” I always got strange looks as the job was a basic job with recreation but I knew it could be more if they wanted it to be. I always found out about their families and learned their names. Some may say that you have way too many employees to do that with everyone, but I have to disagree. I would stay after work and go to special events to do this. Also, work some of the shift with them so that they realize that you are human too. I would find out what their favorite food, color, hobbies and anything else that could be a favorite something. They all had different and unique personalities so I never treated them the same. They became a part of my family.

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LISTEN:
The next would be to truly listen to your employees. If you are able to listen without interrupting the employee and truly care what they are talking about then it will leave a definite impression. Over the years of being a boss my student’s taught me patience when it came to listening. I always had an open door policy as I never made them feel that what they had to say wasn’t important as being in college is a critical part of life as you are making some big decisions. Some of them talked about work related issues and some would come to my office to talk about life. I learned about relationships, divorces, deaths, fun they were having, and down to what they wanted to do when they finished college. I truly cared for them and wanted them to accomplish everything they set their mind to.
“Successful Teams” 
“Do ordinary things with extraordinary consistency, commitment and focus.” ~Jon Gordon (Energy Bus)
Communicate:
I think the one thing I learned fast was to communicate with everyone around you as that is the key to a successful team. At staff meetings always make it a point to let your staff talk and let their voice be heard. Of course, I couldn’t always do what they asked of me due to the budget or other circumstances but I communicated with them why I couldn’t do something and walked them through the process so they understood why. Brushing your employees off will only make everyone crabby and cause conflict in the workplace which I have seen firsthand. It is always better to let your employees know of changes that could affect them as for some people change is huge.

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Passion:
I think having PASSION for what you do is critical at any job you do. No matter what job I do whether it was mowing lawns, working at the local DQ, or any of my professional jobs I always did/do it with Passion. If others see you have that passion it can be contagious. You can’t expect others to be passionate about their jobs if you don’t show you are. I always wanted to make sure things were done correctly and the best it possibly it could be. Also, spending many hours outside of my normal works hours helping out and being there for my employees showed that I cared and was there for them. I challenge you to see if your passion is projected at what you do for work? If there is no passion there then maybe a check to see if maybe if it is the place for you? Of course, there are going to be those moments when you don’t like your job but leaving that at the door helps. I have met some pretty amazing college students that have so much passion for what they are doing and those are the employees you want on your energy bus as they will keep it moving in the right direction.
Are you going to ride on the bus?
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Music on my trips this week was Nirvana with their album “Nevermind” which I could listen to over and over. Also, if you are a Nirvana fan the “Montage of Heck” is an excellent documentary.  Here are some of my favorites:
Come as You Are
Lithium
Something in the Way
Until Next Time…………

“A Personal Struggle”

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I have done quite a lot of traveling this past week from spending a lot of time in Devils Lake and a much needed trip to Bottineau. I have been wanting to do this post for a while but needed to decide for myself if it was something I wanted to share. What I’m about to share is very personal and I’m sharing to let you know that we all have our struggles and no one is perfect. This is so hard as being my introverted self would never talk openly about this, well here goes nothing.
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Should I go in? I’ll be fine, I don’t need to do this, just drive away. I can do this on my own. I’m so not sure about this time is it even going to help me? What if people find out, what will they think?
Who am I? By looking on the outside, I am this happy person who likes to make others happy. I want people to laugh and live life to the fullest and enjoy every moment. I want to be positive for others as I know each person has their own struggles as we don’t know what happens behind closed doors. I have talked about not judging others because someone may seem perfect but they are really hurting or just confused about life.
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Here I go might as well as what do I have to lose at this point, I need this. Where is her office I don’t see a sign on the door. It’s a sign to just leave. Okay here it is. This a small office, I’m just not sure if I’m in the right place. A woman appears and asks “Can I help you?”
Can you HELP me? Yes, please do!!! I was recently told “You have everything; a wonderful-supportive family, great friends, and a great job. What more could you want?” Hmmmmmm as I thought to myself I do have it really good but something inside is being ripped to shreds. Why am I not happy? I was asked one day by a co-worker if everything was okay and she caught me off guard as of course I answered that I was great but was I?
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It is so hot outside but I’m freezing cold. My heart is pounding and I just want it to stop, I just want it all to go away. Why does this happen to me? This is not me I have it all together!!! The lady says “I will need you to fill out this paperwork.” There is so much paperwork, again maybe a sign to just walk out. Why do they need to know all this information about me?
These past few years have have made me question a lot about things in life. I have had a lot of changes that I’m just not sure how to come to grips with. I always had this thought out plan of where I was going with my life and what I wanted to be. Yes, we all know that we can’t plan the future as much as we all would like to. However, for a person who functions like I do this becomes a huge struggle. I always hear, “It’s not a big deal, you will figure it out and will be fine.” but to me I don’t feel like it will. I am a deep thinker and my mind doesn’t work like that as it analyzes and worries about everything even the small stuff.  From my previous posts you know that I workout and listen to music a lot which help calm me. I eat pretty healthy and try to meditate on a daily basis (Headspace.com-Click Here is an amazing app that is free to use and was recommended by an awesome soul). I do the things I’m supposed to be doing but it’s not working anymore.
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Okay I’m done with all this paperwork and feel nervous and scared. Now what? The lady says “You can come in now.” WHAT???? Oh, I just don’t know if I can do this!!!!! Then she says, “What brings you here?” Here I go as I feel the tears start to flood my eyes.
There it is…. I need HELP from someone else, which is always hard to admit and go through with it because I don’t like feeling like I failed. I think I also have this fear that if I share this I might lose people in my life so I will leave that up to you. I don’t want to be treated differently as I am still the same person trying to figure life out. A good friend reminded me that getting help is not failure it is being strong and that being vulnerable is okay. This individual recently shared his story of struggles and inspired me to do the same. I have a lot going on with my fears of not knowing and still always thinking about the past. I need to relearn how to go about my daily life with everything in check and to keep learning about myself. In the MidWest getting help is more of a quiet subject as people look at you like your crazy if you need help which is unfortunate because if we got help when we felt we needed it the world would definitely be different. I guess I felt that there were so many other people dealing with all these huge problems that mine were so little and that I didn’t want to bother anyone with them. By waiting so long and not noticing the alarms you set yourself back. I am not an expert nor will I ever be as this has been a really hard process for me. I just want people to know that it is okay to go and get HELP whether through your EAP at work or by talking to your doctor. I want to be a better person for myself and my family and if this is the way to do it then I’m game as what’s the alternative?! Always listen and be there and don’t brush someone off as Mental Health can come in many forms and we need to be there for one another. We never know what someone is going through so just be a friend as I have found in unexpected places! I’m not sure where this journey will take me in the future but I took the first step.
I am always here to listen so never hesitate to reach out!
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Be you and be amazing no matter what it takes!
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Hmmmmm music was an interesting choice as LIVE has been through a lot with me through most of my lows. of course I have seen them once in concert and to say they put on an amazing show would be an understatement. Just picture, a Rockfest when it is pouring rain out and LIVE is still rocking out like it is no big deal, it was perfect! Here are a few of my favorites, take a listen!
Lightening Crashes: Throwing Copper
I Alone: Throwing Copper
All Over You: Throwing Copper
Selling The Drama: Throwing Copper
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I hope you find the Rainbow after the Storm, Until Next Time………………..

Keep Dreaming

/ wettlaufer88 / Leave a comment
Traveling a lot again this week including Arthur, Casselton, and Grand Forks. I met a lot of wonderful individuals and even got to have lunch with a great friend. Do you ever have dreams? Do those dreams mean something to you? When we are young we are told that Dreams Do Come True, but I’m thinking that is only at Disney World!
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Dream #1: I have a reoccurring dream that someone is chasing me and I always see the safe place at the end but can’t reach it no matter how hard I try. I read that dreams that include chasing means we may not be addressing something in our daily life.
I have always been a dreamer as when I was young I dreamt about mostly wonderful things but those nightmares crept in too. We are also told at a young age to dream and reach for the stars and that nothing is off limits on what we can accomplish. The word DREAM can mean many things so of course I have been researching as it is something I wanted to learn about.
Dream #2: I have dream a lot that my wrists are being slit and what the strange thing is I can feel the burning sensation as I usually wake up right away. Not sure what this one means but I really wish I would quit having it.
Dream Definition: Merriam Dictionary
:a series of thoughts, visions, or feelings that happen during sleep
:an idea or vision that is created in your imagination and that is not real
:something that you have wanted very much to do, be, or have for a long time
Dream #3: I also have had this dream a few times where my teeth fall out, it is the strangest feeling and so vivid. Actually this usually means it lessens our power to speak our minds which I can relate with a lot.
I think it is awesome to dream of all the possibilities life has to offer and that those dreams can be reached if we work hard enough. However, some just don’t come true whether we work hard or not and sometimes that can be overwhelming but we can always come up with a new dream. Oh how sometimes I wish I was still young where anything was possible. I tell my daughter all the time that a dream can become reality however we need to be able to jump to another dream if it doesn’t. Maybe it is about setting attainable goals and not necessarily dreaming as they can at least be reached and then we aren’t so upset if things don’t work out. I am not sure what the correct answer is? Listen to Alan Watts: The Dream of Life-Click Here- it is just so simple and makes so much sense!
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Dream #4: I have this dream where I am back at high school and I can’t remember my combination to the lock at my locker and once I finally figure it out I do not remember my class schedule. I am guessing it means something about lack of control as I definitely feel that when I’m in the dream.
When we are sleeping, dreams although they may not be real they can sometimes set off an alarm to tell us that there may be something that is troubling us. I think making sure we are aware what is going on does help us understand what could be going on in our daily life and maybe in the end we are able to fix it before it takes over. Nightmares are going to be there too as my daughter recently asked if she could have a Dream Catcher to take away her bad dreams away which of course I bought one if it helps her sleep better. Some dreams are good where you get to see people you haven’t seen in awhile or that might have passed away. Also, those dreams where everything is calm and okay as I like to hold on to those!
To Jocelyn every night: “Don’t let the bed bugs bite and if they do take a shoe and knock them black and blue until they go “Coo Coo”.”
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Music during these trips was the one and only Alanis Morissette as I love her album “Jagged Little Pill.”
Ironic (Click Here)-Absolutely love this song
It’s like rain on your wedding day
It’s like a free ride when you’ve already paid
It’s the good advice you just didn’t take
Who would’ve thought…it figures
Hand In My Pocket
All I Really Want
You Oughta Know
Head Over Feet
Sweet Dreams and Until Next Time……….

List In A Bucket?

/ wettlaufer88 / Leave a comment
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I have traveled all over the last two days including Enderlin, Lisbon, Buffalo, Oakes, LaMoure, & Marion so needless to say I had some time on my hands. The words Bucket List come up a lot and I started thinking about what it actually means. Do you have a Bucket List?

What do you want to do before you die? I have a lot of mixed feelings when it comes to the term “Bucket List”. Why do we feel the need to write all the things we want to do on a piece of paper before we die? The movie “The Bucket List” which I think brought this term to light more is quite comical with Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson as Freeman writes a list and Nicholson goes along for the ride but Freeman dies before he is able to finish it. Does it mean he wasn’t successful? I guess I don’t think so as for him he wanted to actually live.

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We write these lists and to me some are so extravagant like I want to go to Australia or I want to climb Mt. Everst. Sure, some of these may be doable if you have the time and money but I’m not sure what the point is? Don’t get me wrong there are things I would like to do yet while I’m still here like go sky diving or surfing but I don’t feel like my life won’t be complete without doing them?! I know they say that by writing things down you are more apt to do them so maybe that is why there are bucket lists and I think having goals is good. Maybe we write a list of what we would like to accomplish each week, month, or year instead of this huge list that may not even be touched? Maybe the lists shouldn’t be about trips and other material things but maybe about helping others like; I would like to volunteer at the Special Olympics basketball games each year?! However, for me it isn’t about the list it is trying to live in the moment, which believe me is very hard for me, and trying to be a good person that people can look up to. I want to live with my morals and values intact but yet have fun along the way.
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Life is very precious and I have been reminded a lot lately about this so I think about those individuals and the legacy’s they leave behind. I think for me to live each day to the fullest potential is what it is about because we don’t know the future and when we will be taken from this life. One Day, One Moment at a time. If you feel the need to make a bucket list then by all means go a head as I’m not judging just trying to make sense of what it means.
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Remember to always Be Thankful, to always Love, and to Live!
On to the music which I decided to go back to my high school years with a special boy band called N’ Sync!:) This band gives me so many fun memories; like the time where we took the train to the cities to see them in concert or watching the HBO special with my friends at my house. Of course, my favorite member was J.T. from the start so here are some of my all time favorites.
Bye, Bye, Bye: No Strings Attached
This I Promise You: No Strings Attached
Pop: Celebrity
I Want You Back: *NSYNC
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Until Next Time……..

*INSPIRE*

/ wettlaufer88 / Leave a comment
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My journey led me to Grafton today and as I sit here at their local Subway staring out the window after reading a book (of course crying and felt foolish so had to stop) and listening to Alan Watts-The Mind (someone inspiring introduced him to me today-Click Here for my favorite so far) thoughts of inspiration have overwhelmed me. Inspiration as I was reminded the other day can come from so many different sources, even cartoons, as it is all around us if we choose to see it. I love the small town feeling when I travel to places as I heard a man say to another “Your son is doing a great job mowing the cemetery.” and I think wow, people still appreciate the small things and it inspires me and makes me hopeful.
What inspires you to be better? Who inspires you? I also believe something that inspires one person could have a different effect on another. I find inspiration in many ways and I’m constantly searching for it so I can make sense out of my life and to be challenged.
Who inspires me? I have had many people in my life who make me want to be better. Of course early on that was my parents as their influence on my life is not measurable as they have taught me that even through hardships something good can come from it and to keep persevering through storms. My sister inspires me a ton too to have fun and don’t sweat the small stuff as she is always being spontaneous which I am not really good at doing (hence the NKOTB concert). Also, my own little family inspires me everyday to just be better with all the love they give me. I have had a few mentors along the way but I would say the biggest influence was at my first big girl job at the Wellness Center. This person would walk into the room and everyone would want to listen because the energy was just radiating from him. He knew to take risks in order to receive the result that was necessary to make the place better and I so admired what he was able to do and what he continues to do even though he has been given some road blocks along the way, truly inspiring. Friends have been there along the way too. A friend most recently who has had a ton of their own struggles is still there to listen to me and give kind words and I’m pretty sure that fits into exactly what I talked about in the last blog about Friendship as just being there for someone can make a huge impact.
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There are so many others out there who I have never met that I draw inspiration from too whether it is in a documentary, an athlete, or even a book they have written. Again I get my inspiration from so many that I can’t name them all but there are a few I would like to mention to hopefully inspire someone else. I have read Jon Gordon’s books over the past few years to try and inspire my student staff so that they could learn something more and be something more. The most inspirational for me was “The Carpenter”-Click Here-as it talks about a carpenter who comes in to another person’s life and gives him so many tools to use in everyday life as he is more than just a carpenter. A documentary that I saw recently called “Into the Wind” about a cancer stricken and leg amputee, Terry Fox, who attempts to run across Canada to raise Cancer awareness, such an amazing story -Watch Here-. Lastly, I have talked about a gentlemen named Zach Sobiech who died at the age of 18 from osteosarcoma and his mom wrote a book “Fly a Little Higher”-See Here- which I am currently reading (hence the crying stated earlier) as her strength defies everything and it is an amazing story that may not have a happy ending but provides me with so much strength and inspiration.
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After typing all this out it seems that the theme is challenge and struggle and how others overcome it. I look at it as if they are able to do it then why can’t I? Inspiration can come from some of the most unlikely places and if we keep our eyes open it is sure to be there when we need it. I will keep trying to find these stories and surround myself with people who inspire and will share them with you (keep your eye out for a new page to the blog called INSPIRATION). I hope to be that person for someone, someday as we all have a story and can all be inspired by each other.
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Be inspired and inspire others is what I choose to live by.
Today’s music came from an unlikely source on the soundtrack from “Walk to Remember.” I know what you are thinking, what a chic flick but if you haven’t seen it yet then I challenge you to watch it. People are taken from our lives too early but it is how we spend our time here that can make a difference one day at a time.
A few of my favorites:
Dare You to Move: Switchfoot
Dancin’ in the Moonlight: Toploader
Cry: Many Moore
Love
Until Next Time……………