The annoying alarm goes off at 6:03 a.m. and there is a chill in the air as I crawl out of my warm, comfy bunk bed. The walk is brisk as I head through campus to the NDSU Wellness Center which is my home away from home. The sweat dripping off my face as I head to shoot baskets after my long run. What a wonderful way to start the day and I feel I can conquer anything.
So life has been crazy, busy traveling for various reasons but there has been something I have been trying to come to terms with. The word “Challenge” has been on my mind a lot as I see so many individuals doing the 30 day plank challenge or a 90 day clean eating challenge. I feel everywhere I look there is a new challenge on Facebook or Pinterest so does a person get something out of doing these challenges? I personally have issues with this type of commitment too as what if I’m not around to finish the challenge, then I would have failed. Have you ever completed a challenge from start to finish without taking a day off?
I have completed other challenges for certain causes such as the 22 Day Pushup challenge (Click Here) which is to raise awareness for Veterans and mental health. I feel more motivated when I’m giving back or raising awareness as that is a passion for me but why can’t I feel motivated like that for my own good? I looked all over the internet and social media to find just the right challenge for me. The thing is I found nothing that raised my interest so I decided to come up with a challenge that would satisfy my interests specifically.
Journal Entry 1: August 15th4:43 a.m. – My inner angel vs. devil thoughts: I don’t need to get up yet. Yes, you really should as it would be great for you to get your workout out of the way. No, I can just work out after work or after I pick up Jocey. Then you won’t have as much time with her or Jason and supper will be late. Just get out of bed and figure it out, you can do this.As, I roll over and hit my second alarm, proceed to get out of bed, and get ready to workout. The workout was exhausting but yet amazing at the same time as I was able to catch up on some old shows. I am ready for the day and I won’t have to worry about completing this after work. This makes me smile……..
I decided to look at my life a little closer to decide what challenge would suit me and my life in this moment. This thought process took me back in time when things were simpler and when I didn’t have my own family. I remembered what it felt like to workout and then after class just enjoy life and hang out with my college friends or study. The challenge I came up with was to workout in the morning before Jocelyn gets up during the week so that I would have extra time after work to be with my family. I would do this challenge for 30 straight work week days or at least that was the plan……
Journal Entry 11: August 294:45 a.m. – Well I can’t even move as my whole body hurts maybe I’ll sit this one out. You have to get up as Jocey has gymnastics tonight and you won’t have time after. What’s the point…….
Obstacles are something we all need to overcome but some are definitely harder to overcome than others. During the challenge that I was trying so desperately to finish without missing a day wasn’t going to happen. This was really hard for me as giving up is not something I do very often. I had fell down the stairs the previous Friday night, broke my toe and landed on my already crappy knees. Then that Saturday I had to officiate a volleyball tournament all day and didn’t want to disappoint anyone by backing out so I just did what I had to do. I think life sometimes slaps us in the face when we are least expecting it. Some days I have anxiety over having anxiety which then makes me feel like I’m having a heart attack and can be scary but life only gives us what we can handle right?
Journal Entry 30: September 294:43 a.m. – You haven’t slept all night go back to bed. No, you need to get up as you officiate volleyball tonight and you won’t have time. Why can’t I just stay in bed and sleep for another hour? You can’t because you will be more mad at yourself for sleeping instead of working out. Today, marks my 30th day of getting up in the morning before Jocey to workout. Yes, it took me way more than 30 days in a row to accomplish this challenge but I continued to try and motivate myself. I learned a lot about myself through this and I think that is the point………
Does a 30 day challenge work for everyone, not at all, but if you make it your own there may be something to it. I am still fighting with myself every morning and some days I can’t pull myself out of bed but I can always hope that the next day may be different.
I’ll leave you with this thought: Why not try a challenge as you may learn something amazing about yourself.
Music has been all over the place as it has been an interesting few months. I hope you enjoy these songs as much as I do:
Hello darkness, my old friend
I’ve come to talk with you again
Because a vision softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence
I’ve come to talk with you again
Because a vision softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence
A tortured soul have I become
It keep’s me safe and leaves me numb, right?
‘Cause in this dream I’m wide awake
It keep’s me safe and leaves me numb, right?
‘Cause in this dream I’m wide awake
I’m a whisper lost upon wind
I’m the ember that will burn you down
I’m the water that will drown you
I’m a star that’s just a black hole now
I’m the ember that will burn you down
I’m the water that will drown you
I’m a star that’s just a black hole now
‘Cause I’m a comeback, I’m a comeback kid
Don’t know why bad things happened, but they did
I don’t think I deserve the hurt I get, but I’m made for it
It’s not the end, no, it’s not the end
I’m a comeback kid
Down for a minute, I’ll get up again
Looks like I’m breaking, but it’s just a bend; it’s not over yet
Don’t know why bad things happened, but they did
I don’t think I deserve the hurt I get, but I’m made for it
It’s not the end, no, it’s not the end
I’m a comeback kid
Down for a minute, I’ll get up again
Looks like I’m breaking, but it’s just a bend; it’s not over yet
Until Next Time…………………..
Traveling With Jo 
Hey, Jo, I read your post and …. 1. You have an excellent way of putting your thoughts down into text! 2. Your words are like a re-run of my thoughts! (Except my challenge is different than yours). 3. I wondered why things needed to be such a challenge for me to get them done until I changed my way of thinking – be it right or wrong, it helped me – I wake Thanking God for the blessings in my life (waking up being one of them, so I can be helpful where I am needed), think of how much better my day is if I get up right away in spite of having a restless/sleepless night, and pray I will continue to be blessed. This helps me from being negative and dragging through the day. I don’t always accomplish everything I’d like to, but at the end of the day think about what I did accomplish, to realize it was a successful day. Life does have it’s daily/regular challenges, but that makes us stronger for challenges that may be tougher as we travel through our journey of life. Love and Peace, Jo. Let your mom know I miss her and hope you, your family and your folks and family are doing well! An ‘old’ friend, Marcia
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